Sing, Sing, Sing...Lessons of Love, Bread Baking, and Happiness

As a begin to write today, I notice that it is 2:56pm, and it's a Tuesday. I have just put two loaves of bread into the oven to bake. The intensely perfect smell of baking bread, sleeping babies, and the hum of my lap top set the scene for me to regale you with my thoughts today.

I hurrah now, for many reasons, but the first thing that pops into my head is that in less than 3 hours, one of my favorite shows will be on TV-Glee. Now love it or hate it, you must admit the show elicits a response from people, and generally its a fairly passionate one. Well, I for one, love it! I know that sometimes the subject matter can be a bit racy and inappropriate, but honestly the sheer talent of the cast, and the songs that they sing bring me such joy that I could really care less what the episode might be about, I just want to hear Leah Michelle sing one more song! Last seasons' episode where Ms. Michelle's character Rachel sang Lady Gaga's "Poker Face", was one I'll never forget, and probably my favorite. Why this love for modern musicales TV comedy/drama? Well, many reasons. First, I grew up watching Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire, Judy Garland, Cyd Cherise, Doris Day, and the like perform and sing the heck out of whatever they were doing. And I loved it, every single second. I dreamed I could dance like Judy, and sing like Doris, and to this day I am teaching my own children songs I learned from those lovely ladies' movies. 

I am so thankful to my own Mama and Grandma for exposing me to these rare talents; I believe they had a part in shaping my personality and choices. You see, singing, music, art, is at the very basis-the very spine, of who I am. I am at my most vulnerable, strongest, most beautiful (IMO) when I am singing.  I took up acting at a very young age and even, for a time, pursued it as a career. I'll not get too deeply into what led me away from the craft, but needless to say, I miss it dreadfully. I spent my last year of high school attending Langley Fine Arts School, and then moved to Edmonton and the UofA to pursue the study of drama more carefully. When I chose to step away from acting, I left a part of myself behind, that even now I haven't recovered...it's on a stage somewhere performing "Much Ado About Nothing" as Hero, or "Othello" as Desdemona (ah Master Shakespeare, how do I love you, let me count the ways).  But, I have always, and I mean always been a singer. I am no professional, let's be clear on that, and I have always shied away from the possibility of commercializing myself.  The part of me that is singer is also worshipper and the two are interconnected with no chance of separation. My relationship with the Lord through ups and downs and life, has always been clearest to me, and closest when I am worshipping in song. Not even publicly necessarily. I can be in my car, or alone, or singing with my children, and such a love for my God comes over me. 

One of the greatest things I have fostered in my children is a love for music. Now honestly, it has not only been me-my children are incredibly blessed to be surrounded literally, by family who are also wonderfully musical. My brother Philip-and hero to Jackson (and countless others), Rob's Dad (affectionately called Piano-Papa by Jack), my Grandma, my Mom & Dad, the list goes on. Anyone who has the great fortune of spending some time with my children will be entertained by Jackson's medley of "The fever song-Johnny Cash", Jesus Loves Me, Twinkle Twinkle, etc. Jack will often be found simultaneously dancing, playing his guitar and singing, while Gemma accompanies him with claps, head bops to the beat, and chubby baby legs bouncing out the rhythm to her brother's tune. It is great fun, and it fills me with endless joy to know that these babies too have the music bug, and they'll be able to pass it along to their children one day. 

I imagine it gives God great joy to look down on his children, my babies, and watch them worship and sing and dance before him. I imagine He claps His beautiful Creator-of-the-universe hands together, and laughs in delight at Jack and Gemma's little performance. I imagine He looks and me and thinks, well done daughter, well done.

Sunday-A Day of Rest & Other things of Note

Today was a great day. Plain and simple, it started and ended very well indeed.  Funnily enough, all could have began rather unhappily were it not for my dear brother and his fortuitous phone call this morning.  Let me explain...I am on the worship team at our church, and generally we practice Thursday nights, or meet early Sunday morning before service to prepare for the service ahead.  This week, our Thursday practice was cancelled, so as is the norm, we would meet Sunday morning instead for rehearsal.  Via text, our wonderful worship team leader let us all know the colors we would be wearing, the song selection, and this mysterious piece of info-that we would be able to sleep in an extra hour this Sunday.  Hmmm, an extra hour of sleep, well that's always good, and very nice, thanks! Just to be sure though, I texted back and asked, so like, we arrive at 9:45am then??? Response-LOL yes (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). K, so honestly one might wonder what planet I arrived from, but I had no clue that this Sunday was the day we turn our clocks back.   So, this morning, I awake at the early hour of what I thought was 6:30am to the sound of little voices emanating from the monitor letting me know it was time for Mommy to get up too. I pulled myself drudgily out of bed, all the while strategizing  how I'd get myself and the kids fed, dressed, washed, etc so that we could arrive at church by 9:45.  Next thing, I turn on the TV-side bar...the kids and I have a tradition of Playhouse Disney channel cartoons every morning of the Handy Manny, Mickey Mouse ClubHouse, Strawberry Shortcake variety. So on go the cartoons, and for some reason, the TV says it is 5:30am....I sit there wondering, hmmm, what's wrong with the TV??? Then it occurs to me, could it be, ah yes, I bet we were supposed to turn our clocks back last night. Ha ha ha, that's funny! okay, so I have an extra hour to prepare this morning, and still make it to church by 9:45am...easy as pie!  I know, I know, you're thinking, HELLO AIME- wake up chicadee-that was a joke-sure arrive at 9:45am cause that's what it would have been yesterday, but today, you need to arrive at 8:45am! Yep, never occured to me that these two things should have clicked. I remained blissfully unaware of my folly. Until, let the trumpets sound, my ever loving brother who I sometimes swear should have been my twin, cause he must have known he needed to call his ding-a-ling sister and save her from abject horror and embarrasement. I will not relay the contents of our conversation, but let it be said that I was totally mystified that I should have to be at church by 8:45, and he was left wondering at my sanity.

Ah, too funny. Well, crisis averted after all. 

Church was wonderful, and I left feeling totally refreshed, and actually came away with answers to prayer over parenting issues that I have been struggling with.  Anyone else struggling with potty-training? Well, I am. First, I am terribly uncommited most of the time, which is completely my issue-and probably the biggest factor. Second, my son who is honestly extremely intelligent seems to sometimes not go on the potty on purpose-of course he has accidents, but the majority of the time, when he messes his pants, I am left convinced that he simply did not feel like telling me he had to go, or just plain didn't want to go on the potty.  So I have been cleaning shorties, and left with the feeling that I will be changing diapers forever, and I just dont know what to do.  Then our Pastor preached a sermon today in which he talked about us being free from the Law, and how the law is fulfilled by love, and we are totally empowered by love and able to do all things through Christ.  Well, the bells went off in my head.  I realized that by telling my son that only babies wear diapers, or big boys go on the potty-I was placing a mantle of guilt and degredation on him.  Instead by telling him that we believe in him, that we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is capable of learning to go on the potty, and that no matter what, our love for him will always be without measure, we would be empowering him to believe that he could actually do this thing that maybe seemed so very dauting or even frightening. 
So I tried it out. Jack had done so well today, and then he had an accident, and he told us right away, and in his eyes I could read the sadness, the disappointment, and even a bit of anxiety over the fact that we would be mad at him....and my heart broke. After we cleaned him up, I took him in my arms, and I told him that it was okay that he had an accident. I told him that everybody has accidents. I told him that Daddy and I loved him so so so much, and that we were so proud of him. I told him that I believed in him, that I knew that he could get this thing, that he was absolutely able to learn how to go on his potty. And you know what, that sweet angel of a little boy looked at me with glee, and joy, and love in his eyes and he put his little arms around me and hugged me so hard. 
Words cannot express what I felt in that moment...above all things, I felt a deep sense of gratitude to my God, my Daddy, who has believed in me countless times when I have made a mistake. I felt in that moment that maybe I had just had a moment with my son that we would both remember forever, favorably. I felt like a really good mother in that moment.

We spent the rest of our day napping, playing in the park amidst leaves, swings, bikes, strollers, and great imaginings (Mommy would you like a large coffee with two cream and a bottle of water?...Imagine you're a frog crossing great lily pads on a giant pond....)baby girl determined to walk on the cedar chip playground floor even though it was wet and dirty, two beautiful children with rosy red cheeks and noses laughing and playing and totally content.

And now, they sleep, without fuss I might add, and Rob and I relaxing. Does it get better than this?? I don't think so. I am so thankful, so incredibly thankful for my life, my husband and children, and above all, the Grace of God which has given me all this joy overflowing.

I hope you all are well and feeling loved wherever you are. We love you, miss you, and pray for you daily. Until tomorrow and its adventures,

Love Aime

Getting Started

At long last, and after many attempts, I have finally buckled down and created a blog. I have always loved to write, but one way or another my attempts have been thwarted either by my own dreadful tendancy to procrastinate, or just a simple lack of inspiration. Lately, however, I have been filled with the need to put my life down on "paper" to catalogue and detail even the meager events in my life so that one day when my children ask what their childhood was like, I'll have a reference point, a place to go where the memories are vivid and alive. I also have been looking for a way to involve my family, dearly beloved, who live in Alberta, in our lives as active participants.  It has been so hard, as a girl who comes from a family where the women are the glue, in a very matriarchical way, to be seperated from my women by miles and miles and miles. I love this about my family-this strong, woman leader characteristic, and have a very, very hard time acceptimg the fact that I am not near them now at this so very important juncture in my life-the raising of my two babies. So, this blog, is for me, for us, for them, to share, laugh, grow, love deeper, understand better, and connect in the best way I know how.

Here's to us All.

Love Aime